They say heart attacks are the silent killer. That’s true…but so are ninjas! (Oh, and silent bears too. They are pretty silent-y and killer-y.) My office was under siege from ninjas the other day. Thankfully no one was hurt. But the affects of their slow, stealthy plan rippled through the office at the torturous pace of a faucet leak; holding us hostage and gripping all of us around the throats until we were begging for mercy.
But, in true ninja form, not a single ninja had been seen. Our invisible office tormentors crept in unnoticed and went straight for the heart of the operation…the Server.
*flashback sguiggily lines* It’s like it was yesterday… *sigh* (oh …well, OK it was like a week ago) With a stretch and a yawn and a mug full of coffee (except for me, I don’t do coffee) everyone makes their way into work. They sit down in front of the screens at their desks and begin powering up their computers while they power up their caffeine levels. In a few short minutes they are revved up and ready to go. Blood pumping to start the day. But wait…what is this? Uh oh! Oh no! This can’t be! *tap tap * “Hello in there?” I say to my computer. My computer responds in kind with it’s on version of “tap tap” S-L-O-W-L-Y it begins to chug along. After dutifully questioning my co-works i realize this isn’t just me. It’s the office. Well.. that sucks. But we make due. We electronically wade through the virtual muck and mire. We are determined to work and do our jobs of bringing love into the hearts of the city. Though after a short time we realize that we might, maybe, just possibly be on the losing side of this battle. I’m getting things done in hours (instead of minutes) So I busy myself other ways. Minimally electronic ways. Hoping that it is a day of nothing more then a glitch that would work it’s self out. Little did I know then that it was so much worse…
And thus ends Day 1 in blissful ignorance.
My comrades and I entered into the office with our game faces on. Weapons bared. Teeth gritting. Arming ourselves again with caffeine and sugar (except me again, I still didn’t like coffee…that hadn’t changed). Determined to work. We were ready for the next battle. Only it was the battle that never was. We sat down at our computers to find that we had been cut off from any outside communication. It felt as though we had fallen into secret tiger trap holes. Separated from our brothers in arms and realizing our defeat, many retreated to the safety of their homes. I was not so luckily…
In a very short time I realize this was no glitch…it was ninjas! It was the work of ninjas in the interwebs! Ninjas in the server! Ninjas everywhere… everywhere except where you are looking that is, that’s why they are ninjas. We tried fighting against them. But now we are locked out. It’s code red. Critical state! This pushed our front line back. Forcing us to retreat and regroup. We devised new plans. We fought back!
But so did they…
All systems failure. 😦 In two days ninjas snuck in to our office, commandeered our computers and put us at a stand still. I was left to man the potatoes.
Entering with trepidation, my co-works tried a third time to work a day of normalcy. And on this day it worked! What? It worked? Yes, it worked. We had been championed. We had been fought for in a battle of such epic proportions that one’s mind will never understand.
One brave warrior fought on when all else seemed defeated. She battled the nefarious foes left and right. She challenged them at every chance. Because of her we were saved! The knight in IT armor rescued us all!
Epic-log (get it…epilogue… epic-log)
During the three days our serve slowly crashing I got a ton of stuff done that otherwise would have waited. It was amazing. But it’s back to the real world now. We are churning out the love from our offices at an even faster pace then before. Some may say it is silly to think that ninjas came into the office and took out our server. But silly or not they did. I know you are wondering how I even knew it was ninjas. All I can say is that when it IS ninjas…you will know. You will always know. Keep an eye out for what can’t be seen.